Peak Day Blues

The White House has 35 bathrooms, 3 elevators, 132 rooms, and 412 doors in it. Musician Eric Clapton grew up thinking his mum was his sister. Canadian researchers have found that Einstein's brain was 15% wider than normal. The citrus soda 7-UP was created in 1929; "7" was selected because the original containers were 7 ounces. "UP" indicates the direction of the bubbles. Actress Demi Moore is totally blind in her left eye after undergoing an operation to correct a squint when she was a child. Angelina Jolie has a tattoo on her stomach that spells out the Latin words meaning 'What Nourishes Me Also Destroys Me'.

IN PRISON... you spend the majority of your time in an 8X10 cell. AT WORK... you spend the majority of your time in a 6X8 cubicle. IN PRISON... you get three meals a day. AT WORK... you only get a break for one meal and you have to pay for it. IN PRISON... you get time off for good behavior. AT WORK... you get more work for good behavior. IN PRISON... the guard locks and unlocks all the doors for you. AT WORK... you must carry around a security card and open all the doors for yourself. IN PRISON... you can watch TV and play games. AT WORK... you get fired for watching TV and playing games. IN PRISON... you get your own toilet. AT WORK... you have to share with some idiot who pees on the seat. IN PRISON...they allow your family and friends to visit. AT WORK...you can't even speak to your family. IN PRISON... all expenses are paid by the taxpayers with no work required AT WORK... you get to pay all the expenses to go to work and then they d

WHAT a performance. If there was any doubting we are witnessing one of the greatest sides of all time it's gone now. There was a time not so long ago when Australia were considered a less than great team on the road. But not now. Yesterday was the nailing of a spectacular grand slam. Australia have now beaten all nations the last time they have met them away from home, an amazing effort. From Lord's to Lahore, Galle to Georgetown, on greentops, dustbowls and a dozen varieties in between, from cool Manchester to choking Chennai, they have been the all-surface champions of the world. Australia went with their strengths and their strengths were good enough. But it needed one of the great team efforts to pull it off. Matthew Hayden, Justin Langer and Darren Lehmann may not have had spectacular series with the bat but every man did something. Even 12th man Brett Lee ran and dived like his life depended on it in the third Test. All of Australia's t

I was browsing through www.cnet.com when I found this interesting piece of article written by Charles Cooper. He says that he recently called up a DSL tech support guy and was describing his experiences and of course his solidarity towards outsourcing. Now he has mentioned DSL tech support!!! Who knows, maybe that call was attended from our Call Center!!! Anyway, I will have to check it up with the call center guys... Here's the article... Click Here to read it in Cnet itself When I recently called up my local DSL provider, there was no doubt about the location of the person at the other end of the line. "Hello, this is Sam," a tech support guy told me with an accent that I was oh so familiar with from years dining in Indian restaurants. If this guy's first name was Sam, then my first name is Ramesh. Of course I had been patched through to India. But so what? "Sam" helped me resolve my issue and I hung up a satisfied customer. Now what if

You have this friend since elementary and after college; then both of you lost contact with each other. But she is someone really special to you, and you are someone very special to her too. Five years later you receive a phone call from her. "Hi, I'll visit you" she says. "Hi, Leah, when?" you ask her. "Just wait for me" she replies. It seems weird but you prepare for her coming anyway. One rainy night you hear a knock on the door. And you're surprised to see that it's your friend Leah. Losing touch for five years is so long and you start talking about everything. Then both of you even go to your room upstairs. Suddenly there is a power outage, but the two of you continue talking by candle-light. Then the phone rings. "I'll just get the phone downstairs," you say. "No, don't get it, we're in the middle of our talk," she says. "It might be important," you say. "Okay if you say so, but p

I've been a great fan of Nintendo's Super Mario since childhood. I still play for a few hours in my home whenever I get time to just unwind (it helps me a lot to unwind after my peakday shifts)... This particular game has won so many fans and it still reigns supreme in this era of Play Stations and Xboxes... I just recently found a spoof for this famous Mario game... Check it out ... It's really funny!!

This is the story about four people named Everybody, Somebody, Anybody, and Nobody. There was an important job to be done and Everybody was sure that Somebody would do it. Anybody could have done it, but Nobody did it. Somebody got angry about that, because it was Everybody's job. Everybody thought that Anybody could do it, but Nobody realised that Everybody wouldn't do it. It ended up that Everybody blamed Somebody, when Nobody did what Anybody could have done.

One day an employee sends a letter to his boss to increase his salary. Dear Bo$$, In thi$ life, we all need $ome things mo$t de$perately. I think you $hould be under$tanding of the need$ of u$ worker$ who have given $o much $upport including $weat and $ervice to your company. I am $ure you will gue$$ what I mean and re$pond $oon. Your$ $incerely, Norman $oh The next day, the employee received this letter of reply: Dear NOrman, I kNOw you have been working very hard. NOwadays, NOthing much has changed. You must have NOticed that our company is NOt doing NOticeably well as yet. NOw the newspapers are saying the world`s leading ecoNOmists are NOt sure if the United States may go into aNOther recession. After the NOvember presidential elections things may turn bad. I have NOthing more to add NOw. You kNOw what I mean. Yours truly, Manager

A man sees another man leaning against the wall of a large building. The second man is puffing away, one cigarette after another. The nonsmoker says, "Sir, I couldn't help noticing how you chain-smoke. How many packs do you smoke a day?" "Four." "How long have you been smoking?" "Thirty years." "That's over forty thousand packs! Why, if you didn't smoke, you could have saved enough money to buy this building." The smoker takes a deep puff and says, "Do you smoke?" "Never." "Do you own this building?" "No." "Well, I do."

I was Event Briefing Biosite Inc.'s earnings conference call and had to encounter a lot of mouthfull words like GIARDIA LAMBLIA, CRYPTOSPORIDIUM PARVUM and ENTAMOEBA HISTOLYTICA/DISPAR And then it suddently struck... why not search for the longest medical word...and here's what I found... PNEUMONO-ULTRA-MICROSCOPIC-SILICO-VOLCANO-CONIOSIS This a lung disease caused by breathing in particles of siliceous volcanic dust. Kudos!!

I just came across this article in economic times which is quite an interesting read of how employers are bringing in new procedures to retain their employees... read on ....

Mysterious banners at a Cambridge, Mass., subway stop have commuters scratching their heads. The signs, challenging passers-by to solve a complicated math problem, are actually a cryptic pitch by Google, which is looking to hire more brainy engineers. The message at Harvard Square also appears on a billboard in California's Silicon Valley, but Google's name is nowhere to be found on the ads. It simply states: {first 10-digit prime found in consecutive digits of e}.com In case you're wondering -- or forgot -- e is the base of the natural system of logarithms, having a numerical value of about 2.71828 (though the number goes on forever). The correct answer to the banner problem leads to a Web site that poses yet another puzzle. Eventually, the determined problem-solver lands at a Google Web page that asks the smart, or lucky, few for a resume. Well now, you night shift geeks, can you guess the number and the website???? Okay, fine... here's it...

A college professor asked his class a question. "If Philadelphia is 100 miles from New York and Chicago is 1000 miles from Philadelphia and Los Angles is 2000 miles from Chicago, how old am I?" One student in the back of the class raised his hand and when called upon said "Professor you're 44.." The Professor said "You're absolutely correct, but tell me, how did you arrive at the answer so quickly?" The student said. "You see professor, I have a brother; he's 22, and he's half nuts . . ."

Was casually browsing through the macromedia website when I found this year's best Flash Video site ... Check it out!!

Courtesy: Vishu

The story is told of a young man who wished to marry the farmer's beautiful daughter. He went to the farmer to ask his permission. The farmer looked him over and responded, 'Son, go stand out in that field and I'm going to release three bulls, one at a time. If you can catch the tail of any one of the three bulls, you can marry my daughter.' The young man stood in the pasture awaiting the first bull. The barn door opened and out ran the biggest, meanest-looking bull he had ever seen. He decided that one of the next bulls had to be a better choice than this one, so he ran over to the side and let the bull pass through the pasture out the back gate. The barn door opened again. Unbelievable. He had never seen anything so big and fierce in his life. It stood - pawing the ground, grunting, slinging slobber - as it eyed him. Whatever the next bull was like, it had to be a better choice than this one. He ran to the fence and let the bull pass through the pasture, o

I did my schooling in Chinmaya Mission for a few years as a kid and we had this class taken by a Swamiji every week for a few hours. And he used to tell us about Swami Vivekananda. I was fascinated that time by this valiant monk. I chanced upon getting a full version of Swami Vivekananda's speech delivered in Chicago on Sept. 11, 1893. Thousands of delegates belonging to deferent countries of the world had gathered at the conference. Vivekananda was the youngest of them all. When it was his turn to speak, his throat went dry. Besides, he did not have, like the other delegates, a prepared speech. He requested the President to let him be the last speaker. His turn did come as the last speaker. He prayed fervently to Sri Ramakrishna and Mother Sharadadevi, and stood up to speak. When he began his address in his pleasing voice with the words "Brothers and Sisters of America," there was a thunderous applause; it lasted for a full three minutes. When it subsided at last he c

Are you always overburdened & stressed at work? Click here for tips that’ll help you unwind, relax & relieve job stress.

YESTERDAY IS BUT A DREAM, GONE AND GONE FOREVEVR. TOMMOROW IS ONLY A VISION BEYOND OUR CONTROL. BUT TODAY IS OURS AND IN OUR HANDS. SO CONCENTRATE YOUR ATTENTION TO THIS VERY DAY. PLAN FOR IT AND SUCCESS IS YOURS.

A man spoke with the Lord about Heaven and Hell. "I will show you Hell," said the Lord. And they went into a room which had a large pot of stew in the middle. The smell was delicious and around the pot sat people who were famished and desperate. All were holding spoons with very long handless which reached to the pot, but because the handles of the spoons were longer than their arms, it was impossible to get the stew into their mouths. Their suffering was terrible. "Now I will show you Heaven," said the Lord, and they went into an identical room. There was a similar pot of stew and the people had the same identical spoons, but they were well nourished, talking and happy. At first the man did not understand. "It is simple," said the Lord. "You see, they have learned to feed each other."

Stress Builder: "I'll never get this file in on time." Stress Buster: "If I stay focused and take it one step at a time, I'll make steady progress." Stress Builder: "My Manager/Lead didn't say good morning. He's probably displeased with my work, and I'll get a bad evaluation." Stress Buster: "I'm jumping to conclusions. My Manager/Lead may have been in a bad mood. So far all my evaluations have been positive, so unless I get some negative feedback, I'll assume my supervisor is pleased with my work." Stress Builder: "I can't get my mistake I made on that Event Brief out of my mind. The file is ruined. I have disappointed everyone." Stress Buster: "No one is perfect. I did my best. I'm overreacting to one mistake when the overall file is fine." Add Stress Busters to your work life. Your ability to handle difficult challenges in the workplace will improve and the benefits will

Enjoy these brain exercises!!!! S'thing to activate your brain cells.... 1. man ----------- board Ans. = man overboard 2. stand ----------- i Ans. = I understand ok?....get the drift? Let's try a few now & see how you fare ??? 3. /r/e/a/d/i/n/g/ Ans. = reading between the lines 4. r road a d Ans. = cross road 5. cycle cycle cycle Ans. = tricycle 6. t o w n Ans. = downtown 7. le / / vel Ans. = split level 8. 0 ------------- M.D. Ph.D. Ans. = two degrees below zero 9. knee! ------------ light Ans. = neon light (knee on light) 10. ii ii

A real horror story!! Happened 2 a friend of mine!! This happened about a month or two ago near Coonoor, eventhough it sounds like something out of the X Files or from Alfred Hitchcock... This guy drives from Coimbatore to Ooty after his shift at 2 in the morning. The inevitable happens and when he reaches the ghats his car breaks down - he's stranded miles from nowhere. Having no choice he starts walking on the side of the road, hoping to get a lift to the nearest human habitation. It's dark and raining and pretty soon he's wet and shivering. The night rolls on and no car goes by, the monsoon rains are so strong he can hardly see a few feet ahead of him. Suddenly he sees a car coming towards him. It slows and then stops next to him - without thinking the guy opens the car's door and jumps in. Seated in the back, he leans forward to thank the person who had saved him when he realizes there is nobody behind the wheel!!! Even though there's no one in the

Sandalwood Smuggler Veerappan Shot Dead....!!! Details awaited guys... The brigand with the deadly moustache, Veerappan, had a crime life spanning four decades. The toll: At least 120 people, 2,000 elephants, more than 88,000 pounds of ivory, and sandalwood worth millions of rupees.

courtesy: Caroline

Thomson Financial has received a subpoena from the Securities and Exchange Commission for certain documents related to its Capital Markets Intelligence business. In a news release, Thomson Financial said it's cooperating fully with the SEC and has been informed that the inquiry "should not be construed as an indication by the Commission or its staff that any violation of law has occurred." Thomson Financial, a unit of Thomson Corp. (TOC), provides market intelligence services. It said its capital markets intelligence business collects stock ownership data solely as an appointed agent of its public company clients seeking a better understanding of their institutional shareholder base. The company said that, in 2003, about $33 million of Thomson Financial's capital markets intelligence revenues were related to the identification of institutional investors for its clients. Thomson Corp., Toronto, provides information, software tools and applications.

A story tells that two friends were walking through the desert. During some point of the journey they had an argument, and one friend slapped the other one in the face. The one who got slapped was hurt, but without saying anything, wrote in the sand: TODAY MY BEST FRIEND SLAPPED ME IN THE FACE. They kept on walking until they found an oasis, where they decided to take a bath. The one who had been slapped got stuck in the mire and started drowning, but the friend saved him. After he recovered from the near drowning, he wrote on a stone: TODAY MY BEST FRIEND SAVED MY LIFE. The friend who had slapped and saved his best friend asked him, "After I hurt you, you wrote in the sand and now, you write on a stone, why?" The other friend replied "When someone hurts us we should write it down in sand where winds of forgiveness can erase it away. But, when someone does something good for us, we must engrave it in stone where no wind can ever erase it." LE

One day, a girl, 16yrs old, heard from her mother that if she will do a regular prayer for 4 yrs, a divine “Devi" will come to her dreams & give her 3 boons(Varadaan). So she decided to do it. She completed 4 yrs successfully, doing prayer regularly. Now it was a day for "Devi" to come. So she slept earlier with thoughts in her mind to ask. And, really a "Devi" comes in her dreams. Now this is the dialogue between them. Devi: O Girl, you prayed to me regularly within last 4 yrs, so I am very very happy with you. I will complete any of your 3 wishes. You can ask anything you like, but there is one condition. Girl: Condition! What is that? Devi: You have a boy-friend? Girl: Yes. Devi: When you were doing a prayer, he was waiting for you, so he also sacrificed same as you. Moreover, he didn’t know anything about boon and all, so he is also eligible for the boons. So whatever you will ask, he will get 10 times more than that of you. If you a

A Delhi-based computer salesman who duped an Indian girl, working with Motorola in US, of $39,000 by contacting her through a matrimonial website has been arrested, police said. The 30-year-old accused, Akhil Mukherjee, a school dropout was arrested recently from his Deshbandhu Apartments at Kalkaji in New Delhi on charges of forgery, DCP (Economic Offences Wing) Prabhakar said. To read the full story, click here

Courtesy: Caroline

The Government today announced a new broadband policy intended to promote the use of "always-on high speed" Internet. "The prime consideration guiding the policy includes affordability and reliability of broadband services, incentives for the creation of additional infrastructure, more jobs and the induction of latest technologies. I am confident that broadband at speeds of 256 kb and above would be available for Rs. 500 to 800 a month,'' said Mr. Maran. He said he expected companies to roll out broadband services within the next two to three months. To read the full broadband policy, click here

Who is the first Indian bowler to claim a hatrick? . . . . . . . Answer is : Mr. Kachra from Team Champaner PS: For those who don't know what that means, Kachra is a character in the oscar-nominated movie from India, Bollywood - Lagaan who claims a hatrick against the british in that movie.

In its first big post-IPO maneuver, Google Inc. Thursday is releasing free software that allows consumers to search for e-mails and files on their computers. With the much-anticipated launch of its Desktop Search software , Google is addressing a chronic consumer headache and extending its reach from the Web to consumers' hard drives. It moves Google more squarely into Microsoft Corp.'s turf, since the software giant has dominated anything to do with hard-drive based files and e-mail to date and plans its own competing product. Google Desktop Search lets users search within Microsoft Office and text files on their hard drives, e-mails, AOL instant messenger chats, and Web sites they have visited in the past. Once consumers install the software, it creates an index of their files to allow for speedy searches. When the user then conducts searches on Google's site, it shows results from their own files in a small box above the Web search results. They can also conduct

Frank: "Recently, I was honored to be selected as a judge at a chili cook-off. The original person called in sick at the last moment and I happened to be standing there at the judges table asking for directions to the Budweiser truck, when the call came in. I was assured by the other two judges (Native Texans) that the chili wouldn't be all that spicy and, besides, they told me I could have free beer during the tasting, so I accepted". Here are the scorecards from the event: Chili # 1 Mike`s Maniac Monster Chili Judge # 1 - A little too heavy on the tomato. Amusing kick. Judge # 2 - Nice, smooth tomato flavor. Very mild. Judge # 3 - (Frank) Holy shit, what the hell is this stuff? You could remove dried paint from your driveway. Took me two beers to put the flames out. I hope that`s the worst one. These Texans are crazy. Chili # 2 Arthur`s Afterburner Chili Judge # 1 - Smoky, with a hint of pork. Slight jalapeno tang.

founders Larry Page and Sergey Brin are touring India and plan to hire engineers, online sales and support personnel for its development centers in India. During their low-key visit, Page and Brin seemed more like vacationing college students than newly minted technology moguls as they shopped in New Delhi's Connaught Place and rode in a three-wheel motorized rickshaw in Hyderabad. The 31-year-old wunderkids also called on Indian President A.P J. Abdul Kalam and let it be known they are eager to hire some of the country's top computing talent. On a lighter note, the billionaires answered to a question during the select media briefing that they would love to take the autorickshaw back home to California because of its maneuverability. To catch more on this, click here

Google announced a new test service that allows people to use mobile phones or handheld devices to tap Google's Web search via text messages, or short message service. Called Google SMS, it delivers business and residential listings, product prices and dictionary look-up. But according to reports, this service is currently available only in the US. Let's cross our fingers and pray that it soon comes to India too. Click Here to check it out!! Three Cheers To Google!!

"IT'S A GUY THING" Translated:* "There is no rational thought pattern connected with it, and you have no chance at all of making it logical." "CAN I HELP WITH DINNER?" Translated:* "Why isn't it already on the table?" "UH HUH," "SURE, HONEY," OR "YES, DEAR" Translated:* Absolutely nothing. It's a conditioned response. "IT WOULD TAKE TOO LONG TO EXPLAIN" Translated:* "I have no idea how it works." "TAKE A BREAK, HONEY. YOU'RE WORKING TOO HARD." Translated:* "I can't hear the game over the vacuum cleaner." "THAT'S INTERESTING, DEAR." Translated:* "Are you still talking?" "YOU KNOW HOW BAD MY MEMORY IS." Translated:* "I remember the theme song to 'F Troop,' the address of the first girl I ever kissed and the vehicle identification numbers of every car I've ever own

Banta Singh and Santa Singh were tired with the mobile communication and decided to use the conventional method of communication. That is, to use pigeons to send messages. One day Santa sends his pigeon. When the pigeon reaches to Banta it is without a message. Banta picked his mobile and asked Santa "What is this? The pigeon is without message". Then Santa says "Oye khotey.....that was a MISSED CALL"

George Bush goes to a primary school to talk about the war. After his talk he offers question time. One little boy puts up his hand and George asks him what his name is. "Bob". "And what is your question, Bob?" "I have 3 questions. First, why did the USA invade Iraq without the support of the UN? Second, why are you President when Al Gore got more votes? And third, what happened to Osama Bin Laden?" Just then the bell rings for recess. George Bush informs the kiddies that they will continue after recess. When they resume George says, "OK, where were we? Oh that's right --- question time. Who has a question?" A different little boy puts up his hand. George points him out and asks him what his name is. "Steve" "And what is your question, Steve?" "I have 5 questions. First, why did the USA invade Iraq without the support of the UN? Second, why are you President when Al Gore got more votes? Third, what happe

As the aftermath of Indian defeat in the first test match between India and Australia, here is a PJ. A man is caught in a traffic jam, when suddenly someone taps on the window of his car. He lowers the window and asks what he wants. The man says, "The Indian Cricket Team has been Kidnapped and the ransom is 50 million dollars. If the ransom is not paid, the Kidnappers have threatened to douse the Team with Petrol and set them On fire. We are taking up a collection, do you wish to contribute? The man in the car asks, "On an average what are People donating ?" The other man replies, " About 5 to 10 liters "

Hello Guys!! It's that time of the day again when we pull up our socks for another "lively and entertaining" peak season. I started off this blog last peak season to make you guys relax and take a little pressure off your shoulders during the peakdays. I sincerely hope that it was useful to you guys. As human beings, we've accepted feedbacks from the day we joined kindergarten and it has helped to groom ourselves to what we are today. As in this case also, I would like to hear from you guys!! What is it that you guys/gals (no gender bias pls!!) want to see here?? Are you satisfied with the contents or you would like to see anything else....be open and creative... So, here's the team of Peakday Blues wishing you all another successful peak season ahead!! Cheers!! PS: You can put your views in the comments section of this article....

Read this 'Hate Letter'. It is so funny and creative. This is a love letter from a boy to a girl.... However, the girl's father does not like him and want them stop their relationship......and so.. the boy wrote this letter to the girl..he knows that the girl's father will definitely read this letter.. 'The great love that I have for you is gone, and I find my dislike for you grows every day. When I see you, I do not even like your face; the one thing that I want to do is to look at other girls. I never wanted to marry you. Our last conversation was very boring and has not made me look forward to seeing you again. You think only of yourself. If we were married, I know that I would find life very difficult, and I would have no pleasure in living with you. I have a heart to give, but it is not something that I want to give to you. No one is more foolish and selfish than you, and you are not able to care for me and help me. I sincerely want you to

A junior manager, a senior manager and their boss are on their way to a meeting. On their way through a park, they come across a wonder lamp. Theyrub the lamp and a ghost appears ! The ghost says," Normally, one is granted three wishes but as you are three, I will allow one wish each" So the eager senior manager shouted, I want the first wish. I want to be in the Bahamas, on a fast boat and have no worries. Pfufffff, and he was gone. Now the junior manager could not keep quiet and shouted "I want to be in Florida with beautiful girls, plenty of food and cocktails." Pfufffff, and he was also gone. The boss calmly said," I want these two idiots back in the office after lunch at 12.35pm" Lesson I : "Always allow the bosses to speak first" >>>>>>>> Standing in front of a paper shredding machine with a piece of paper in his hand. "Listen," said the CEO, "this is a very sensitive and important docum

Have you been thinking about putting yourself up for sale lately? Ever wonder how much money you could get on the open human market? Check out HumanForSale.com

Three salesmen were bragging who is the best. The first said, that he is so good he sold a color television to a blind man. The second bragged he sold a HI-FI stereo system to a deaf man. The third said he sold a Cuckoo clock to Banta. The other two said, so what? The third salesman added, 'Along with the Cuckoo clock, I also sold him fifty kgs of bird seeds!!!!!'

This is the best lawyer story of the year, decade, and probably the century. A Charlotte, NC, lawyer purchased a box of very rare and expensive cigars, then insured them against fire among other things. Within a month having smoked his entire stockpile of these great cigars and without yet having made even his first premium payment on the policy, the lawyer filed a claim against the insurance company. In his claim, the lawyer stated the cigars were lost "in a series of small fires." The insurance company refused to pay, citing the obvious reasons: that the man had consumed the cigars in the normal fashion. The lawyer sued .. and won! In delivering the ruling, the judge agreed with the insurance company that the claim was frivolous. The Judge stated, nevertheless, that the lawyer held a policy from the company in which it had warranted that the cigars were insurable and also guaranteed that it would insure them against fire, without defining what is considered to

99.99% of these pathetic laws come from different parts of America and about 95% of these still exist today. Only some of the states have these stupid laws... You cannot drive while asleep. Blind men are forbidden to drive automobiles. It is forbidden to run out of gas. You cannot drive without a steering gear. A woman cannot drive a car unless a man is running or walking in front of the car waving a red flag to warn approaching pedestrians and motorists. Jumping from a plane or dropping an object from a plane is illegal. All people on city streets must walk or ride. They cannot crawl, sleep or stand. It's illegal to ride on the roof of a taxi. All taxis must carry brooms and shovels. You cannot walk down the street with your shoelaces untied. It’s illegal to board a plane while in flight. It is illegal to cross the street on Sunday unless it is an emergency. Planes are forbidden to fly over town on Sundays between 11 am and 1 pm. A law in

Are you ready to take the TOTFL (Test of Tamil as a Foreign Language)? Joot! Questions: 1) What is a Jujubi ? a) Something sweet b) An easy one c) A tough one d) An Alwaa 2) What is Alwaa? a) Something you find in Tirunelveli b) What a girlfriend gives when she marries someone else c) A laddu d) Jujubi 3) What do you do with a Gujili? a) Gujaals b) Gilma c) Gilpans d) Galij 4) What is the respectful way to address a friend? a) Machi b) Sir c) By name d) Aiya 5) Who is a 'Frooti' ? a) A studious person b) A sportsman c) The professor d) A soft drink 6) When someone says 'nambitten', what do they mean? a) I don't believe you! b) Sure, I believe you c) Are you nuts?? d) I have to catch a bus 7) Who or what is Peter? a) A tourist b) Someone who talks only in English c) Peter Jones d) Your teacher 8) For which of the following ! events will you say 'Gumbaloda Govinda'? a) When you

What do their names really mean!! 1. NIIT: Not Interested in IT 2. WIPRO: Weak Input, Poor & Rubbish Output 3. HCL: Hidden Costs & Losses 4. TCS: Totally Confusing Solutions 5. INFOSYS: Inferior Offline Systems 6. HUGHES: Highly Useless Graduates Hired for Eating and Sleeping 7. BAAN: Beggars Association and Nerds 8. IBM: Implicitly Boring Machines 9. SATYAM: Sad and Tired Yelling Away Madly 10. PARAM: Puzzled and Ridiculous Array of Microprocessors 11. C-DOT: Coffee during Office Timings 12. AT&T: All Troubles & Terrible 13. CMC: Coffee, Meals and Comfort 14. DEC: Drifting & Exhausted Computers 15. BFL: Brainwash First and Let them go 16. DELL: Deplorable Equipment & lackluster 17. TISL: Totally Inconsistent Systems Ltd. 18. PSI: Peculiar Symptoms of India

Saddam Hussain visits God and asks him: Saddam Hussain: "God when shall I see the defeat of George W Bush?" God replies: "Son, you will not see it in your lifetime." Hearing this, Saddam Hussain starts crying and goes away. Gen Parvez Musharaf visits God and asks him: Musharaf: "God when shall I see the capture of Kashmir by Pakistan?" God replies: "Son, you will not see it in your lifetime." Hearing this, Musharaf starts crying and goes away. Laaloo Yadav visits God and asks him: Laaloo Yadav: "God when shall I see Bihar becoming a prosperous and happy state?" Hearing this, God starts crying. Laaloo is astounded and asks "God, why are you crying?" God replies: "Son, I will not see it in my lifetime"

Reasons computers must be male!! They have a lot of data but are still clueless. A better model is always just around the corner. They look nice and shiny until you bring them home. It is always necessary to have a backup. They'll do whatever you say if you push the right buttons. The best part of having either one is the games you can play. The lights are on but nobody's home. Courtesy: Sumi

"Do you believe in life after death?" the boss asked one of his employees. "Yes, Sir." the new recruit replied. "Well, then, that makes everything just fine," the boss went on. "After you left early yesterday to go to your grandmother's funeral, she stopped in to see you". Courtesy: Sumi

10 best things to say if caught sleeping at your desk 1. "They told me at the blood bank this might happen." 2. "This is just a 15 minute power-nap like they raved about in that time management course you sent me to." 3. "Whew! Guess I left the top off the White-Out. You probably got here just in time!" 4. "I wasn't sleeping! I was meditating on the mission statement and envisioning a new paradigm." 5. "I was testing my keyboard for drool resistance." 6. "I was doing a highly specific yoga exercise to relieve work-related stress. Are you discriminatory toward people who practice yoga?" 7. "Why did you interrupt me? I had almost figured out a solution to our biggest problem." 8. "The coffee machine is broken..." 9. "Someone must've put decaf in the wrong pot..." And the #1 best thing to say if you get caught sleeping at your desk..... 10. " ..

A Malaysian septugenarian tied the knot in 1957, and tied it again and again - 53 times. This week, he's gone back to where he started, remarrying wife no 1. "I am not a playboy. I just love seeing beautiful women," Kamaruddin Mohammed, 72, was quoted as saying by the New Straits Times newspaper. Kamaruddin's latest bride, now 74, was the first woman he married and divorced. In between marrying Khadijah Udin, in 1957 and again on Monday, the "easy going charmer" married 51 times, including to an Englishwoman and a Thai. He stayed with the Thai the longest, for 20 years, the Times said. His shortest marriage lasted two days. All his previous marriages ended in divorce except with the Thai woman, who died of cancer, he said. "After she died I thought of Khadijah and sent several people to inquire. I didn't expect her to accept it," said Kamaruddin, who worked for several multinational companies before retiring in 1992. Despite all th

'This is Captain Sinclair speaking. On behalf of my crew I'd like to welcome you aboard British Airways flight 602 from New York to London. We are currently flying at a height of 35,000 feet midway across the Atlantic.' 'If you look out of the windows on the starboard side of the aircraft, you will observe that both the starboard engines are on fire. 'If you look out of the windows on the port side, you will observe that the port wing has fallen off.' 'If you look down towards the Atlantic ocean, you will see a little yellow life raft with three people in it waving at you. That's me your captain, the co-pilot, and one of the air stewardesses. This is a recorded message.'

Martin wakes up at home with a huge hangover. He forces himself to open his eyes, and the first thing he sees is a couple of aspirins and a glass of water on the side table. He sits down and sees his clothing in front of him, all clean and pressed. Martin looks around the room and sees that it is in perfect order, spotless, clean. So is the rest of the house. He takes the aspirins and notices a note on the table. "Honey, breakfast is on the stove, I left early to go shopping. Love You!" So he goes to the kitchen and sure enough there is a hot breakfast and the morning newspaper. His son is also at the table, eating. Martin asks, "Son, what happened last night?" His son says, "Well, you came home around 3 AM, drunk and delirious. Broke some furniture, puked in the hallway, and gave yourself a black eye when you stumbled into the door." Confused, Martin asks, "So, why is everything in order and so clean, and breakfast is on the table waiting

"Walking stick", an insect that looks like an ordinary twig. "Walking sticks" have adapted to resemble their surroundings. Most of the time, their predators pass them by as they would appear a real twig. Courtesy: Rani

Courtesy: Russell

Junko Suzuki, a radio DJ, demonstrates how she sleeps with a 'Boyfriend's Arm Pillow' in Tokyo Friday, Sept. 24, 2004. The pillow manufactured by linen maker Kameo Corp. consists of a headless torso and a stuffed arm that curls around the sleeper. It might make some people uneasy but have sold about 1,000 in Japan since the product went on the market last December. The maker says the pillow is not only an emotional comfort, but that its shape keeps the body balanced by supporting the sleeper from both sides.

> There was once a young man who, in his youth, professed his desire to become a great writer. When asked to define "great" he said, "I want to write stuff that the whole world will read, stuff that people will react to on a truly emotional level, stuff that will make them scream, cry, howl in pain and anger!" He now works for Microsoft, writing error messages.

Don't Marry AIRTEL girl; she will do magic on u. Don't Marry BSNL girl; she has connections with all Indians. Don't Marry IDEA girl; she touches u tomorrow, not today. Don't Marry RELIANCE girl; she takes u in her mutthi mein. Don't Marry HUTCH girl; she follows u where ever u go. MARRY ONLY BPL GIRL, BUY ONE GET ONE FREE…………

"If my faith burns bright, as I hope it will even If I stand alone, I shall be alive in the grave, and what is more, speaking from it" Mohandas Karamchand Gandhi Oct 2, 1869 - Jan 30, 1948

Passengers on a Lufthansa flight heard this announcement from the captain: "Ladies and Gentlemen, I am sorry to inform you that we have lost power to all of our engines and will shortly crash into the ocean". The passengers were obviously very worried about this situation but were somewhat comforted by the captain's next announcement. "Ladies and Gentlemen, we at Lufthansa have prepared for such an emergency and we would now like you to rearrange your seating so that all the non-swimmers are on the left side of the plane and all the swimmers are on the right side of the plane after this announcement all the passengers rearranged their seating to comply with the captain's request. Two minutes later the captain made a belly landing in the ocean. The captain once again made an announcement: "Ladies and Gentlemen we have crashed into the ocean. All of the swimmers on the right side of the plane, open your emergency exits and quickly swim away from the p

Courtesy: SuMi

The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the EU rather than German which was the other possibility. As part of the negotiations, Her Majesty's Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a five year phase-in plan that would be known as "Euro-English". In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of the "k". This should klear up konfusion and keyboards kan have 1 less letter. There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year, when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like "fotograf" 20% shorter. In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be ekspekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible. Governments will e